Extreme Weight Loss

Extreme Weight LossSo I was looking at some past archives of email and stumbled across this one dated 3/16/12 and came across an email from the casting crew @ Extreme Weight Loss

We just wanted to take a moment to say THANK YOU for applying for Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition.  At this time all of our finalists have been notified.  We wish you the BEST OF LUCK ON YOUR WEIGHT LOSS JOURNEY…WITH OR WITHOUT CHRIS’ GUIDANCE, with one small change each day moving forward, you can succeed in meeting your goals – YOU ARE WORTH IT! 
Thanks again for everything!
The EMWLE Casting Team

I remember this night. I was with a friend of mine at a local bar watching the Michigan State Spartans in the national Championship for NCAAB. I was a nervous wreck. I was constantly looking at my phone or looking to see if a new email came in because I was in the final stages of the Casting Process for Extreme Weight Loss TV Show. I had gone through the open casting process and then moved on from round to round. That night I would have a huge set of emotions that I really don’t think I’ll ever be able to truly explain. It made me psst. I blogged about it. Not an extreme bashing of the show but I was just mad at the process. I had tried again the following year and made it to call backs again but didn’t hear anything after that.

I was devastated. I was looking at This show but more importantly Chris Powell as filling the void of a past mentor.

You see when I was younger I had a person that wanted to help me, not just me but many others. His name “Larry Coker” Larry had lost a significant amount of weight and I mean a significant amount. He wanted to do good and I believe his intentions were good. He mentored a bunch of us kids that were young and obese. Them fame set in. A possible radio gig and a book deal was looming and Larry stopped showing up to weekly meetings. We’re all on the news, when on Kelly & Company (local Detroit TV Talk Show) Us kids were really involved in this. We had no idea of his motives at the time.

I had lost about 70lbs and was getting noticed by my peers in school, I was moving faster and able to do more things on the ball field, baseball was and will always be my love. Bust when he stopped showing up there was nothing else that could feel the void.

I believe I still hold this grudge after all this time. Why? There was never an apology. He had to have others say sorry Larry had other obligations and couldn’t make this weeks meeting. In fact I don’t even know what happened to him and for some reason often times I wonder.

The reason I’m saying all this is. I feel some of this contributes to my weight. I’m afraid of success because I don’t want to be “Larry Coker”

I can lose weight. I’ve proven that to myself many times, but when I start reaching and coming close to goals that lead to a form of success, I bounce. I sabotage the thing. Kinda like what was done to me when I was younger.

Now some of you will say “Jess, You’re full of shit” “All of this is inside your head.” My rebuttal to that is you’re right. This is in my head. As much as there are things in others heads that cause them to be alcoholics, or addicted to drugs. It’s a disease. Let’s not get obesity twisted. However I do have the choice to fix it.

I’ve never been able to rise above this. It’s a constant struggle. I have plans that I will be the mentor that this man could not be. Giving the opportunity I will help kids looking for an answer, I will help people, I will not give up on them. It’s too important.

This post is my promise that when I become the success story instead of the statistic, I will be in anyone’s corner that needs me. Present time as well.


Phase 1 90 days lose 75lbs

Well hello there.

Yes I guess I’ve decided to come back. I’ve taken a short absence from my site as I was trying very hard to refocus on what I really wanted out of my weight loss journey. These past few months have been very tough for me & my family. As some of you may know I tried out for and made it pretty much as far as you can go in the casting process for the EMWLE show with Chris Powell. Due to Logistics reasons I was not picked for the show. When I’m ready to talk about it all I will dedicate a post about the process. I didn’t get picked and I took it very hard. This has led me to now. Now is where I have to do this on my own. I know what it takes I have all the tools, I have all the support from family, friends, blog community, my readers, twitter followers, and so on. You’re all in my corner and I couldn’t thank you all enough.

This site has always been my release. Wither anyone reads it or not. It is the way I’m able to just let it all out. I’ve been doing this since I believe 2002.

Anyway. I have updated most of the pages on here with new info, I’ve also update my Facebook fan page so please head on over to there and give it a like. I have basically turned my basement into my mini gym and will incorporate the Nerd Fitness Rebel Guide as my workout program of choice. I will be doing my own 1 year transformation. All by myself. (Well and with the help of Family & Friends, that means all of you)

I have no more excuses left, when I really thought that this show was going to do it for me I really wasn’t thinking of a plan b and everyone was asking me what my plan B was? I was so involved in believing that I was already picked that I put it on the back-burner.

Plan B is and always was Plan A……..LOSING THIS WEIGHT IS WITHIN ME. wither I was going to be on a show or not I was going to have to put in the effort/work

The whole transformation will be done just like the show but my own way. I will do the 4 phases (every 90 days)

Phase 1 =  75lbs 50lbs now till end of June

Phase 2 = 50lbs  July till end of September

Phase 3 = 50lbs October till end of December

Phase 4 = 25lbs 50lbs January til end of March 2013

this will result in 200+ lbs lost

With that being said, Welcome to my journey & Welcome to Phase 1 75lbs in 90 days. Come on and tell me it can’t be done because I’ll use that as fuel only to prove you wrong. Tell me to go for it, I’ll use that with the same drive. Tell me that it’s going to be hard. I’m ready to cry, bleed & sweat for this.

I’ll be weighing in every week on sat and posting video journals weekly. Progress Photos will be done once a month. We’ve ordered a new scale bease the lady in our old one was telling us that we’re about half of our current weight and we couldn’t fix it. I as soon as I get it I will post my starting weight.

By the time Fitbloggin comes around I honestly hope to be 100+ lbs lighter. I have to set an example that I am doing this.

Thank you all




I’m alive, a very honest rant/post

I’m alive.  I’m posting this while laying in bed trying to go to sleep cause my mind and body is telling me I need rest but just have had too much on the brain as of late and it tends to keep me up. 

I’m not doing well at all on the diet front, yes Ive gone to the gym a few time and Ive done my best to try to stay motivated.

I’m really strugling to find what deep down inside is the problem that pushes me to food.

As Ive stated before in a previous post, I get on these kicks.  Story of my life.

I haven’t stepped on a scale in a few weeks and I’m afraid to. 

I’m not giving up, I just think I need to start over.  Back to the basics.

I used to get emotionally upset about this all but I don’t anymore.  I honestly think it’s because for once in my life Ive learned that I’m the only one that can change me.  No one else but myself.  I used to cry because I wanted someone to help.  I used to cry because I was hoping that for example Chris Powell would come running to save the day. 

The thing is even if the above were to happen, I still have to do it. 

A friend of mine said to me in an email how she new that Ive always been the person that if I want something I always find a way to make it work.  She also reminded me that it’s also my nature that in my worst of times. I’ve always

found a way to make it work.

I need to start all over back to square one.  I need to take the you have to fail to succeed approach. 

I need to dig down deep and find the I am, I can, instead of the I want, I will/tomorrow type attitude.

Thanks for letting me rant, be honest, be truthful & get this off my chest. 

Posted from WordPress for Android

The Scale Doesn’t Lie Weekly Weigh-In (Progress Pic)

Well, I have officially changed some things in my journey.  I figured if EMWLE doesn’t call (although 3ball productions the production company visited my site) I still have to battle this and I can still use Chris Powell’s help.  I have incorporated his reshapethenation plan and it seems to be working.  5 meals a day and a gallon or more of water included with exercise.  I feel really good.  It’s not as hard as I thought drinking that much water.  It’s the bathroom trips that make me go crazy.  I’m sure as my body says hey I’m getting this water all the time now then the bathroom breaks will settle down some.

I have done a lot of reading as of late and it has helped me.  Went and singed up to our local library to get some books on transformation and how I can get myself more healthy. 

This is not easy and it shouldn’t be.  I have to teach myself that this is forever and I think I’m finally now ok with that. 

last week I weighed in at 484lbs

This week the scale said 478lbs  -6lbs week and a total of 47lbs lost since 1/8/2011

click here for progress pics

I’m really happy and do believe that this system is working.  The water give me that get up and go attitude it’s crazy. 

Thanks for all the support.

Growing Up As TooBIG

Growing up, I had a wonderful childhood.  At least at home and with friends and family I did.  When I was outside of that environment, I had it rough.

There is no name on this earth as far as overweight is concerned that I hadn’t been called in my lifetime.  Try being a 12 year old kid having to deal with that day in day out.  I can understand in today’s time why bullying is such a big issue in schools.

I can remember being in the 3rd grade and even the teacher making fun of me.  It was horrible.  Not too many people know the story but then the teacher would even get the other kids involved.  Try living with that all your life. It even went as far as her telling me that I had to pick up her dirty tissues that she tossed and missed in the garbage can.  She didn’t ask any of the other kids.  It was her way of making me do it so that I wouldn’t get picked on.

I hated going to school when I was a kid.  I remember reaching my braking point in school one year where I picked up desk and threw them.  Picked one kid up and slammed him into the wall.  I regret that now because I should have kept cool. There’s never any good in violence.  I just thought that maybe doing that someone would finally listen.  The only ones that did were my Parents who took me out of that school and into another one.

Now you may be thinking that could have made things worse, new fat kid in a new school.  Nope, it actually turned out to be the best thing.  I made a ton of new friends and never once did I have a problem.  Until Jr. High and High School then all the jokes and name calling came back.   All those bad kids that I had gotten away from were now all in the same school again. 

Now days it’s like I hear the voices saying the same things or think that people are thinking the same things. They just don’t say it to my face.

Please watch this video from this seasons Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition where Chris Powell give a guy the business for making fun of Dana a member of the show. 

This right here is why I so want this man to help transform me.  He truly gets what we go and have gone through.  He knows how to fix/correct those inner daemons that I’m not quite sure anyone can or that I would feel comfortable with.  With him it’s different.  I have never met the man and wish to god that my prayers are answered.  In just a short period of time from doing my research and reading/watching what he has done for people.  I know that the end result is I would only be able to repay him in friendship but it would be one that would last forever. 

New Plan, Time For Change

As some of you have noticed.  I have been lying to myself.  I had a moment at #Fitbloggin and then lost it a week after being home.

This shit stops now…….

I’m submitting a casting tape to ABC to be on Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition.

I reached out to Chris Powell on Twitter and he responded back to me.  I posted his tweet to my blog.  (Goal = To meet this guy one day)

This is my last attempt at trying to find someone else to Help Me.  (please don’t bash me that I can help myself, I know this to be true)

This doesn’t mean that I’m stopping my journey.  I’m just starting over.  I’ve made a decision and a Goal that I will lose 200 pounds by this time next year,  I have also reset my counter on my page to show that I have 200lbs to go.  

I will do this because I need to do this.  Every day that I wake up is a reminder that God has giving me another chance to make things right.  

I’m looking for help cause to be quite honest I don’t have the funds or the money to get a trainer, I don’t have the funds to get a dietitian.  I don’t have the money to pay for a gym membership.  But I do have one (gym) at my job and I need to take advantage of that like I had in the recent past.

The problem I have with working out is I get bored with it because I have no clue what to do.  (I’ve always just tried to find things to keep my body moving when I’m there)

I’m not looking for handouts, please don’t think that. You can’t get handouts in losing weight, you have to want to do this yourself.  “I WANT TO DO THIS”

This ultimate journey and plan that I have for myself starts right now, I hope you all join me if you haven’t all ready.

@TooBIG Go for you my man! I can’t wait to see your casting tape :) #EMWLE

Twitter / RealChrisPowell