I’ve posted many times how I’ve failed and all that bull shit. I struggle all the time trying to figure out why I’m this way. I don’t mean for all you smart asses out there saying “you eat too much” What I mean is the simple fact that I can’t come to terms with why I’m treating myself this way. It truly is a disease. I’ve made excuses my whole life. I’ve tried to make promises that I could never keep. I’ve set goals that I never seem to obtain. To myself I’m a failure. The only thing in my life that I’ve ever gotten right is my beautiful wife and little angel Shelby. Why should they have to put up with my actions. Why should they put up with me being a ticking time bomb. What if my promise to get healthy was for them would that help or would I just fail on them like I have myself. We all know that only I can do this. I have to make the right choices. I’m the one that puts the food in my mouth. I’m the one that chooses to go to the gym and workout.
I beat myself up because I always want an answer. I always want to know why. So much so that I beat it till it’s blowing dust….lmao (made ya think for a min right?) But I’ve never been able to find the Y in Jess. I’ve never been able to find the answer. None of y0u can answer this for me, only me. You can all have your say or opinions but nope, not even a doctor can right a script for this disease. The answer my friend is in me.
It’s time to get serious about getting serious. It’s time for me to find the answer. Then and only then will I beat OBESITY.
So with that being said, I’m starting all over. Back to 0 pounds lost. This is my last attempt at getting it right. This is now my journey to find the answer.